me and you.

had the 2nd worst exam of my life this year (out of 3)
haha
and yes,
resided to my comfy home to catch up on FRIENDSHIPS and movies newly released.
eg Silence of the Lambs.
The Girl Next Door.
Two Weeks Notice.
Four Brothers.
ETC ETC ETC. ( by now you shldve realised my sarcasm wasnt well meant)
andddd this week alone, i've watched like 3 movies.
The Lake House which was predictably sweet!
2.37 was alright. Vik's kinda show. hurhur.
Thank You for Smoking. ridiculously lame. S:
and others.

and today,
i'll give the Nott a pass. (:

the exam was fucked.
i didnt have time to finish 2 pages of it.
shall i comment how many qns each sheet had?
@#$%^&*()_+)(*&^%$#@!

MEG MY DARLINK is coming in less than 24hrs!
YAY the first to come to melb for a visit!
i cant cant cant wait dear.
look out for the hotttt beetle okie?
(: mwahhhS* with all my loveeeeeeee.

ooooooooh
yday was an eventful day at my place.
with the whole dvd gang- vik mark tim dil me ansh(was on sick leave haha)
marina and rasha didnt mk it. alex and ken gave a pass too.
but overall,
i shant say more, other than,
it was the sweetest dvd night so far.
and altho i KNW very well what we agreed on regarding our current fucked up situation,
i cant help it.
S:

to you:::
babe, (or shld i still say ____ (insert name here) )
2 words to describe this whole shit thing-
MIXED Signals.
we just DONT DO THAT ANYMORE.
it was fun the first time- when the first date didnt seem like the last.
and it was plain, yet bearable, when the first fight didnt seem like a resolution.
and YES,
it was greatt the first time- when the first SOBER cuddling didnt seem like an obligation.
B,
we've been thru this a thousand times.
and i tink you knw very well where im coming from.
i know just how certain our standards of behavior were set on.
and how SURE we were never to cross that barrier.
but you do the things you shldnt- once more.
you hold me
and when you do,
you keep me still.
there with you, beside you, like the most helpless creature one could find.
S:
and as much as i'd love to say ilu*,
(and yes i do),
i cant.
cos' you hold me out like im supposed to do smth FOR you.
babeee-
i've come to learn that im NOTHING.
nothing too great that i can even start to EXPECT a tinge of love or concern.
nothing too insignificant that i can avoid your every move and stare,
and hope you would notice.
im really nothing,
when it comes to finding you.
i knw how sweet you are,
and how FUNNY and CUTEEEEE you lil gudji gudji are.
but plain as can be,
i cannot keep waiting.
imu* and thats why i try to be there.
i really do try.

hooked onto the songs- Call me when youre sober.
and If you Could Only See.
and Me and You by Cassie.
OMG ppl d/l these songs.
the bestttttttttt! (:

fucked.

exam tmr.
im fucked.
thats the best way to describe my mood now.
in fact, its my situation.

if i didnt try to resolve my pathetic social life amidst studyin period,
perhaps i wouldve gone much further
but u knw me,
i NEVER get very far.

tsktsk.

i got fined today in uni.
north 1 carpark.
fuckers said that my parking permit is 'forged'.
yahh..
well i didnt buy it myself, so i wldnt knw where the fuck it came frm.
i got it from someone.
a random dude.
so if he fucked it up,
im fucked.
and hence, perpetuates my current mood-
fucked!

meg, the only glimpse of light in my mind right now,
is comin' on friday.
wheeeeeee. -skips ard till i notice: exam is tmr-
hurhur.

i cant cant cant wait!
that lil angel.
have a safe and perfect flight here!
(till i get ya! at the airport!)

i am suffering from hypomania.
i shall self-diagnose myself.
i hateeeeee the idea of having to sit an exam i KNW i havent prepared for.
what's worse,
im only focussing on the PFE or the movie dates we all planned etc etc
(i hope everyone's got their plans for postexam meditation purposes)
hurrrrr.
well, i do!
(: a treat of retail therapy and NORMAL dates!
taadaaa -tamborines clash!-
yes you heard me right.
N-O-R-M-A-L dates. for once.
without the nitty gritty weeds of a perfect day gone wrong.

holyf*ck.
i tink im gonna sleep thru tonite so i dont get to stress over my lack of organisation and exam strategy!
in addition,
i have mark my loveeely boy to acc me to flunk this exam.
(once this once, he quotes)
yesh.
see! thats what friends are for,...
rightttt?

ooooh. whilst offering chocs to evryone that day at the CMHSE (thats the med building btw),
i heard smths i SHLDNT.
like a nasty, thought-to-be-harmless comments frm the tribe.
(the you-knw-what-tribe)
maybe they didnt mean it,
mayb they just felt a sudden bitch burst of INappropriate intonation accompanying their choice of oh-so-melacholic-words. (by now you shldve realised i make up my own lingo. hahaa)
yes. anyhow,
someone (i shant name ppl) displayed it's (notice: IT) utter ignorance to certain nationalities.
as well as the unnecessary labelling of MY skin (ie. eurasian)

ok. tmr i'd probably forget what i ranted on abt today.sighs.
i prolly am just in a bad mood thats why.
):

sigh. god, its your turn now.
help me pls.

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ystday was officially the saddest day of our entire friendship.
yes.
(note: friendship)
we yelled on the phone (literally SCREAMED our butts off)
for almost 1 hour ++.
it was constant yellin',
with not a single second used for breathin.
or even listening to each other.
we just yelled what WE thot was right
not what was actually evidently right.
and now,
nth is happening.
even on the phone,
we're dead silent.
we've got nth to say to each other anymore.

and as much as you hate me or despise me
and wish me dead ):,
i really cant do anything bout the misunderstanding we had.
twas I who had made an irreparable mistake
of opening my big mouth
and 'gossiping' (as you'd call it).

we were supposed to be tog at my place right NOW
(even tho exams r in 3 days plus)
cos you promised me saturday will be ours.
LOOK NOW at this. at my lil hole here.
im fuckin lonely.
and NO i wont resort to studying
cos ive been there and still, i didnt do well AT ALL.
so im over it.
and im over this!

pout*
-hands on hips-

i baked a bunch o' cookies last night,
drove over to your place in a jiffy
and passed them to ya. (w a sweet sweet note)
maybe i didnt make myself clear-
im NOT doing it cos I think im wrong (in the misunderstandin).
i did it cos i wanted to.
and i.... well,
i guess...
imu.

THERE I SAID IT.
so dont say im always hiding things.
pout.

im hooked onto "ever the same" by Rob Thomas.
its soooooooo sweet i tell ya!

Fall on me
tell me everythin you want me to be

i am bored.
and my fucking neighbours just keep going in n out of the garage,
or have sex in some random corner of the house,
or even have a house party at 3 fucking am in the morning.
while I, ohhhh humble I,
am stuck ALONE in my randomised thoughts of NOT having a life,
and yet,
contemplating my soon-to-be regret for not having done any work for the coming exam.
im fucked, arent i?

-nods.

after this episode of unnecessary sleepless nights and
painful, painful tears,
ive woken up with the decision and will
NOT to care anymore.
even calling is not an option.
resist rach, resist.
and as much as dilini tinks im NOt over it,
im gonna pretend my arse off.
teehee (dont kill me, babe)
im just tryin to live.


ohhyes ppl, watch the Chase movie
fucking good.
bout racism. PROMINENT racism.
so its relevant.
and its soooo sad.
i NEARLY had outbursts of tears (if not for the bad bad movie envt i was in- cold, food-less, and ALONE)
sigh.

fall on me- tell me everythin you want me to be

special shoutout to STEFFIE:::
awwwww babe.
thanks for the entry bout me. teehee
its funny how we started from NOT A SINGLE word spoken in IJ,
to sleepovers, and clubbing,
and faggin tog,
and now, girlfriends for life.
(: ilu* babe.
and take things slow.
just like us. tryin to work things out before they fall apart
):
sigh. call me soon dearest.
with missin' and lovin'. (:
------------------------------------------:::-----------------------------------

i cannot even start to comprehend what life will be in the future,
or imagine how we'll go on any longer.
like a sudden change of mind
to hint a tinge of regret.
wait a min,
maybe not regret-
just untold longing.

its good tho.
cos i stopped thinking bout the other 'you'.
the heartless 'you' with no idea how to be faithful
or how to love.
the 'you' with the sweet tongue of deceiving words.
the 'you' i never want to love again.
EVERR again.

sigh*
met you in the hargrave andrew lib today
and we didnt speak a WORD.
yes believe that.
maybe a harmless hi-bye.
nth more.
and how much i wish i cld just burst out and tell you
just how much i miss you
and tink of you
and want you to tink of me too.
ergh.

uhhh- the pain.
of watching you walk rightt past me
or just sit quietly where you always do.

---
im bored.
im home. skipped prac. hehe.
LEARNT effectively NOTHING today.
oh yessh,
besides that horrendous fact that our eyes catch ONE out of a million trillion photons in a given space.
hurhurrrrr.
-nods-

YOU dick, REPLY ME.
gosh*.
ive reached the point of NOT caring,
of NOT trying.
anymore.
im past the stage of nEEding someone for company,
of wanting someone to just grab my hand when i cross the road
or holding me while walking btwn lecture theatres in the rain,
or telling me how much im missed,
or loved.
or simply to be.

im over this.
this dreadful need to be touched (NOT DIRTILY you freaks. haha)
im OVER this.
i really am.

thank God for ppl like dilini anshini rasha theekshna (our new gossip partner).
i alr feel loved.
cos even when we have awkward moments
of arguments
or misunderstandings,
of silent treatments,
or annoyance,
we're still close. and im sooo glad to have them
to you girlfrens named above:
ilu* thanks for being there. (:

to you:::
sometimes it seems like i dont trust you enuf.
and other times
i seem like i dont give two fucks about anything involving YOU.
but thats just me-
the girl next door, who cbf with anything,
dont givashit bout studying anymore,
walk ard campus oblivious to those ard me,
and just basically being.. well, me.
but you must knw, (i swore to you before n i'll say it again)
i DO trust you
and i really do try.
in fact i feel liike im the only one trying at all.
i do the smallest things to take care of you
like give u my umbrella even tho i clearly hate the rain,
msg you to remind you to keep warm,
call you to check if youre tucked in bed
and ALL THAT.
and i still dont knw what you want from me instead.
but ilu* i do. and dont say it to cheer me up.
just dont say a thing.

STEFFIE! i knw what you mean
when we are happiest if we dont expect anything
and get the smallest things from him.
(: rock on babe.

2nd day 2nd day 2nd day

//a rreallllllllllly random pic of my lil babyyyyyyyy vik.

(its the most photogenic one i got) teehee.

to you::: bbbbabe. HALF DAY done! teehee. yesyes a milestone. ure righttt.
loveeeee.

ok.
theek and dilini are at my place now
STUDYING
whilst i waste precious time BLOGGING.
yes.
exams are in a freaking week.
and im reallllll fucked.
I KNOW.

anyhow.
i realise just how NORMAL it is to have someone.
its nth much and nth great too.
but jst as i doubted the significance of this,
i catch myself gleammmmming to myself in kfc today,
and in uni postoffice,
and even at my own home.
how scary is tht?!?!
oh wells shit happens.

230806

by my title,
you'd prolly guess the significance of today-
230806 yesyes

teehee.

went to watch 2.37 (the retarded movie)
was alrightttttt
but not that good anyway.
twisted sick plot which btw, is created by a CURRY.
yes pple.
go read the fine print : by M (smth smth smth)
YOU GET MY POINT.
its an aussie film w curry editors.

after which, we rushed to The Hawthorn.
was alright.
i was relatively closerrrrrrr to allister
and vik of cos.
but omggggg i cldnt drink cos i was driving.
so i totally danced under the influence of my own skills and not alcohol.
heheh.
yes yes.
anddddddddd we went over to Nevermind (a totally HOTTTTTly cooL pub)
with a nice veranda and all that.
omg i loveeeeee it!

anyway got tired
so i sent vik n kara home.
YES you heard me. S:

--------------UPDATE. the reallllll update.----------------------
sometimes i tink YOU tink its funny
how you make mistakes
but ego gets the better of you.
and how you make others sad and disappointed
but ignorance leads you on.
i dont want to complain,
and as a first-person point of view in this,
i see myself with absolutely zilch say in this.
(not like i have a million things to say)
but i wish i cld try to.

everyone sees it.
and tongues WILL wag (whether you like it or not)
and by me denying it,
its saving YOUR arse.
so dont pull a fast one on me, mister.
i knw just where YOU'VE been.
nat (or whoever she is) is none of my business.
but i'd appreciate a kind gesture of Over it!
babe,
dont do this to us.
wanting smth to be kept a secret
just to protect your arse and your 'social butterfly- yadayadaa' image
is cheap.
we BOTH knw that. (denial is a sin btw)

if you tink that for once,
i dont trust you or what you say basically,
then you reallyyyy dont knw me well.
cos' im not like that.
thts JUST NOT ME ok.

if you insist you dont knw my past or anything like that,
go to uni,
check out the med sporean dudes,
LOOK for the longish streaked blonde hair dude.
HE's my past. or lets say 'a past' (he was nv mine to begin with)
thats ALL there is to this med scandal thingy.

med ppl are dumb. I AM dumb at least.
we dont knw when or how to get into rships
and once we're in it,
we dont knw how to get out of it.
we're dumb im sure.
we dont knw what to say to help bad situations
all we do is pretend like we knw a dx, when really,
what do you do if someone's on the verge of suicide.
(no, seriously, tell me)
WE KNW NTH to begin with.
lest the way to love another.

a quickie today. S:

just got home from chaddy w alex.
( i just adore that place!)
watched the movie Chaos.
was good.
i would say- worth borrowing its dvd when its out.
but not worth the ticket.
hehe.
(OMG im becoming a cheap shit)
okok.

anyhow,
today, once again,
DIDNT meet you as expected.
(but then again, ive learnt NOT to expect anything from you)
but a pleasant pleasant surprise...
our firstttttttttt (hopefully not CANCELLED again) date
is tmr night.
movie at chaddy (hehe again)

vik::: i may knw why you cldnt mk it yday or today (this im unsure of)
but i just dont get why you dont try to tell me first.
i knwwwwww im not in any position to expect smth
and i knwwwwww i shldnt.
but sometimes,
it takes ONLY a weee bit o' effort to get to me.
and youre just that ounce of tryin' away.
tmr will be my lastt day for you.
and shld it be ruined by unforeseen circumstances,
i hope you knw i nv did give up waiting for you to start DOING what you promised to do.
and basically be even a normal fren to me.
i realise what you want is what you like to see.
not what i want to be, or even AM!
S:
hope you prove otherwise to me tmr.
and hope im not gonna be disappointed by what you have to say to me.
i knw N****** is an issue
and i knw just how you feel.
but dont take your foulplay out on me.

i knw everyone is prolly just pulling out their hair,
wishing i wld just CHANGE
and stop letting MEN ctrl my mood or schedule.
and sometimes i wish i had listened,
if not, my broken heart.

STUd-Stud-studyyyyyyyy!

shitday instead.

OKAY FINE, God.
make everything in my life perfect (like my frens family etc etc)
but give me dumb retarded loserly MEN.

i shant complain
on the plain account that your dad was back from canberra.
but hellloooooooo??
since when did MAN stop using technology!??!
I KNW how apologetic you are about this
and hw ure feeling really bad abt this (or at least i hope so)
but ohgod.
u knw what, NVM-
im over it.
waiting and yaddaa yaddaa.
):

OK LINN- no more nice updates for my 'date' that technically shld have been great.
S=

youre still a sweetie tho.
i shant deprive you of tht.
but try to mk it more sincere,
even if youre not.

my day has come. (:

today is the day ive been waiting for
since foreva ( ok fine. not THAT long.)
since... the day J. let me dwn.
today is the day (officially) when i start my wholeee social life up agn
(yesh, without You in it)
and the day i fall agn.
this time, in a good way.
-winks*

i would love to say that im excited.
well, technically i shld be.
but im just normal.
no tinge of expectancy for you tonight,
so no pressure's on.
no hope for a better someone else,
cos youre all i got nw.

and i knw i shldnt be so easily ascertained
by the pure fact that you like me as much as i wish he did,
but thats hw it works.
hw I work.
today, we'll be watching 237 (some random movie)
and sometimes,
i wonder if it'll ever be what I like.
cos' youre some social butterfly,
fluttering endlessly
whilst i find my lil hole in some corner,
tryin not to get noticed.

and i think,
i'd never really knw you.
with the amt of things you hide from me,
i think even josh cant beat that.
(well technically he DID. but thats cos i didnt knw u)
and with each morning i get past with seeing you instead (of you-knw-who)
i think i'd regret if i didnt say
just how much i wish he was you, and viceversa.
so you cld be the one i miss ever so much
while he walks on by, and waves a friendly good-day.
like i didnt notice him.

rant rant rant.

if you asked me why i hide so many things too,
i'd say its cos youre not the one i'd share it with.
and if you asked me why.
i'd tell you how much i wish you were
but we both knw that he's got me.

wake up with me in the morning
and i'll fall fer you tmr.
if it takes him two seconds to be loved by me
and a whole year for you to be noticed,
i think you knw just where my life's been.

i love you for being that someone
i chose to love instead of him.
but till the day i dont think of him
and where he's been
or what he's doing,
you've got my mind,
but we knw who's got my heart.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEEEEEEEX

today is ALEX birthday!
(:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR ALEX!
is it me, or is someone getting TWENTY and matured??
(: teehee.
thanks for being that beautiful person you are to everyone.
especially ME
and just for you today,
here's a pictureee of you (the middle jewish guy).
and there's allister alex and patrick.

dude, i LOVE YOU!


i just realise how un-emo i've become.
(: oh yay.
all my posts of emo-ness and uncalled for worrying from others is gone. all gone!
on a lighter note,
i have more more more pics of friends and yadaa yaddaa.
you see J!.
i dont even NEED you anymore.
(or maybe i never did but i cldnt get over you). it seemed lk just yday
when my mind was filled with you
and i never EVER imagined a life without you in it.
but then agn, YDAY wil only be a memory to me.
TODAY, on the other hand,
im moving so fast
WITHOUT you,
and for once (honestly speaking)
i feel like i can soooooo do without.

and a turn of the moment,
i feel so much freedom imposed.
unto me.unto my friends WITH me.
i am loved.
and kerf and all are right-
i dont need josh to feel beautiful.

cos even if im not,
i know i will be.

Trivial night- a blast!

// NICE?? (say yes. haha)
//marina & i- Trivial Night's Deco Managers. teehee.
//this is my sweet sweet allister. that darl'!

//anshini,dilini,tim,me,mark. TABLE 9 rocks. haha.

//ME. yes. (i changed that flower to a red one)



Trivial Night was great!! Pictures up! (: It was the fun-est (and only) trivial night i ever had!! I won the Corner Game!! hehe. it was shit. who wld have thot PURPLE wallibees exist. haha. anyhowwwww, I DIDNT take pics with Vik. DAMNIT.

ohhh. and we went to tim's place. it was GORGEOUSSSSSS. god. that mansion was amazing. (:

yes yes. anyhow,
tmr is studying day.
andddd sunday (besides church)
im meetin vik for our official 'first date' at the movies.
hope its not shit.
well technically it wont ever be.
he's sucha sweetheart.
uh- i swear i cant waitttttttt till then.
(:

tooloots ppl!
night werld. (its 4 am here and im STILL awake)

tsktsk.

tonight is Trivial Night.
HOW FUN IS THAT?
its held by our very own IGNITE committee.
(some rural international health group tingy in med)
theyre really jittery now. to all: (esp ken n rasha mydears)
DONT FRET peeps.
i'll support you even if minor details arent fixed,
or the balloons droop too low due to lack of helium,
or the streamers fall off the ceilings cos i cant paste for shit,
etc (you get my pt).

hope tonight is a success.
and 3 cheers to us! (:

andddd another person (a veryyyyyyy special one)
i must congratulate,
is Miss Soh Yilin.
yes linnie one n only!
congrats for straight 4 As in ur A levels.
(you shldve came to med man!)
hehe.
ilu and i miss you lotsssssssssssssssssssss. mwahhhs*

as for meg:::
OMG 2 more weeks and youre HERE. literally.
i cant wait my dear.
with much loveeeee and missin'.
come sooooooooooooooooooooooooon and dont fret abt exams.
YOU'LL DO FINE. another person i knw with straight As WILL BE you.
ilu! mwahhh!

im bored.
and im getting impatient waitin for oh-dearest VIK to answer my call or msgs.
im supposed to pick him now.
and get to trivial.
(you see, he has a fren's 19thparty to go to so he cant drive).
WELL AT LEAST i hope he doesnt drive!

vikkkkkk mah dearest:::
pls pls pls pls pls dont drive to that bar thingy.
firstly its dangerous to drink n drive.
(and im dying here, worrying abt YOU).
next, when u leave trivial early,
i'll be there alone (cos im a ditz at trivial)!
so i can send u to that icon bar.
(:
sigh* i dont even knw if youre reading this.
im just ranting on.
and hope someday you'd hear my heart instead.
(:

m&m ball pictures are uppppppppp!

ooooooh. so so hot!
the theme for the m&m ball was 1920s gangsta.
ive got the pictures now! say yay! (:
i just love how much fun med ppl have
even amidst all the stereotypes. (:
and for those who missed out on this night,
WHOOPSIE DAISY! bad move.

as for all else- we had a greatttttt time,
didnt we? (: teehee.
enjoy the pictures!

//go figure. (hint: alcohol, dancing, HUGGING, dot dot dot) //thats allister ON TOP of my vik! pout! (dont mind my reaction. haha)

// so who said rach cant be a 1920s gangsta? (: //this was a candid shot ok! TOO candid! thats rasha and mark. and me!!!

//ok all med pple (melb uni's med too). there's rasha me tim dilini mark. the other couple is a mystery. S:
//wanna take a walk on the wild side with muah? (: (seductive aint i?)
-pple dont chuck a fit over the 1st pic.
just GO figure.
somehow i sense an awkward confrontation tmr morning in uni
hmmmms.
-winks.

*still very much in love with you*

MORE MORE MORE

//(top) Patrick!!, (bottom) dilini allister (mah pimp!) and myself. yes yes. another pubcrawl pic! (:

// we just wouldnt let go. (: teehee.
//dilini and myself. vodka anyone?
//sarah jie and me. back home in melb.
//rashaaaaaaa n me! in Bendigo, the shithole (heee. it rhymes!)
//THIS IS ME when im awfully tired after a hospital tour. in Bendigo. SEE HOW SHIT that student ID pic is! poutsssss!

PEEKatus! haha peektures!

// this is my lilllllll baby vik *wink-stef-wink* at pubcrawl.
//just couldnt get enough of you. (: (we're drunk by this time btw) //on the trip to Bendigo, rural victoria! (rasha, tshenolo, marang, me!)- i was TRYING to be cool. obviously, NOT working. haha

//im just me. pub crawling night! (: //im starting to think we besties look alike. (: juice anyone?

YAY. internet up!!!!!

oggayyyy.
so i finally got felix to tap my festy neighbour's internet. (dont mind the diction)
anyhow,
NOW IM AT HOME with internet.
teehee.
(ok thats a bad thing btw.)
that means LESS studying.
andddddd a compromise of education.
hurrrhurrrrrrrr.
(:

cheesy.
hell's yeah!
(:

spent todays lectures and practical with the usual gang.
but TODAY TODAY, (yes i meant the repetition)
i was mostly BESIDE mark.
(literally- besideeee)
well, thats supposed to be a funny thing.
cos we practically GOSSIPED our lives away during histology
(we really shld stop. haha)
anddddddd
we even left early durin that prac
just so we cld grab a bite and such.
ahhhh.
(:

now im hooked onto my lingo
(which i admit- with utmost disgust)that i shld change.
yesyes.
its bad. for attitude, social health, blahblah (incl craig hassed here)
(:
so yesh...

OHHOHHOHH !
i just got an interview for a nanny job down at east bentleigh.
to be a trainee nanny
(which means paycheck AS A TRAINEE too)
hahah.
anywayssss,
yes!
the hrs are SHIT. the pay is SHITTER. and the treatment is SHITTIEST.
the ppl there treat you like dirt.
LITERALLY dirt.
like some random out-of-place b*tch tht shldnt be ther.
but still...
we all knw,
in the name of modesty and an honest living,
we must tahan that shit.

anyway,...
a sweet sweet shoutout to vikram todayy:::...
lil babyyyyy vikki!!!
(: tk cr of urself. and get well soon.
PLEASEeeeee.
imu alr! and if all's forgotten,
just rembr-
SMILE.
and i'll be smiling right back at 'cha.
(: mwahhs* with all my love.

yes J.
realise this- no more special loveydovey 'imissyou' SHIT shoutouts
to you anymore.
youre worth NOTHING of my time
and effort
and if you MUST judge me (and whatever i do)
pls be reminded-
im not that into you.
(: yes yes.
and if i may add-
honestly?
fuck off. right off my face.
you take up too much of my air with YOUR ego.
so pretty please spare me.
(of all the shame you bring along wit' chu)

an eye for an eye- makes the whole werld blind.

ok.
update time! taadaaaa.
*drumroll*

i wouldnt say im too bz to update (even tho CLEARLY I AM. haha)
well.... anatomy is more prevalent to me now.
yes yes.
lil rachel's finally learnt the hard way OUT.
ohwells.

dissection yday was a hoe.
i was shit hungry during the first hour
and i could swear i was near faint yday.
teehee.
(oh that was a random entry. buttttt anyways...)

thank you dearest stef for calling me frm sunny singapore that day!
(: love love.
you made my day.
mwahhh*

couldnt ask for more, could i?

the m&m ball was ALRIGHTTTTT.
just alright (only),
dint have THAT much fun- worth 50 buckeroos.
butttttttttttttttttt
did have an eventful MOMENT i shant comment further on.
but knw that,
(attention: stef linn xy cand etc)
im STILL sd.
yes yes i still am. dont snigger behind that monitor back home!!!
):
ohwell. i cant complain- i aint looking to be un-SDfied.
/anyways....

exams are in 15 days plus.
OMFG yes pple, (those in med)
GET UP on ur arse and start working OK.
(its ironic cos i shld be telling maself that. teehee)
all u singaporeans (hopefully u arent reading this. Hurhur) stop.
you guys've done wayyyy too much for human tolerance.
(: hehe. good luck anyways.

okok.
gotta get back to WERKKKK.
ohyes.
now, my last sem's studying regime has been re-inforced this sem!
with late nights IN UNI's hargrave andrew lib.
YES PPLE.
kiss muahh stinkin grades goodbye. (no. im serious. LITERALLyyy)
heeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
-hysterical lufter-

hope to hear from u agn stef.
oh and linn xy and allll.
imissyou guys all so so so so so much.
loveeeeeeeeeeeya toooo. (: mwahhhs*

to stef::: BABE! watch it ok!
dont be too comfortable with a 'stranger'. (you probably alr established a non-stranger-ish relationship. but STILL)
be careful. im worried for you dear.
ilu* with so muchhhhh hugs and kisses.
tk cr babeeeeeeee.

to megg::: WOMAN! comehere NOW (pls leave your prelims behind in spore. haha)
me n sam are dyingggg without you.
ohhh and i have MORE to update you abt my life!
hurhur.
(: love and missing. sooo much thinkin bout youu!!
(:

): non-existent blog. sniff.

i havent updated for a long long longggg time.
and i realise its useless.
practically only MYSELF reads this shit.
teehee.

went to the Creative Costume shop today!
got gloves! and HIMAWAN got a bowler hat.
(: for our 1920s gangsta theme for tmr's M&M ball.
yes. that means- Monash & Melbourne Uni ball.
shits.
hope nth catastrophic happens between the 'cousins' tmr.
(: heeeeeheeeeeeeeeee.

sorry to those faithful readers who have missed out soooo much on my daily updates
(mainly cos i DIDNT update)
haha.
so...
anyways, been stressed.
technically year 1 isnt meant to be tough.
unless of cos, youre in MY cohort,
where studying is a 'relaxation' technique for craig hassed and all his *toot*s.
oh well....

anyhow,
so i land myself in clayton on friday evening,
after a shit good week at rural bendigo.
and after which,
had dinner on fri nite with mich and kris my honey bunnies!!
(:
anyway,
bendigo was alrite. not THAT rural really.
and many things happened there.
esp when we got wasted.
and pretty much spent useless time lying on the floor in our aptments,
watching Simpsons and oprah winfrey.
*you get the idea*

anywayyyys,
school's been shit.
really unnecessary stress.
we just started anatomy.
and its really getting us UP, as well as Down.
(not down syndrome btw)
we've all got the medical stud syndrome,
which inculcates the excessive use of medical jargon
and de-technicalisation of ALL ASPECTS of life.
and practically,
being a total prick and fuckedup shit,
that annoys all,
EVEN those amongst us with NO idea wtf just happened.
(:

well well.
i cant complain,
when im the victim of such random shouts for humanity.
im desensitised now.
after cutting up a whole cadaver.
that poor old lady had her whole shoulder sliced and surgified
with all the med students' slashes and gashes.
S:
i cant say i'd want to be a body donater myself after death.
seriously. )":

now that its over.
and i've totally "unmastered" the idea of the shoulder joint and what not,
im gonna reside to a life of simpsons.
anddddd futurama!! (yes its back on tv pple!)
oh oh oh!!
and of cos-
i talked to my dearesttttttttt daoni yday.
(: so glad to be closeeeee to him again.
a sudden rush of nostalgia is just running thru me.
and i realise-
i miss you, dear.
):

-------------shoutout------------------
to YOU.
yes. thanks for ruining my bendigo trip..
well,
at least for being there and turning a perfect bar night out into a total hoe.
i dont think i'd everrrr be able to thank you for all the fucked up things you did.
and maybe i never will.
but i'd be glad if you CONVENIENTLY (of cos, of cos) just disappear from lectures
and out of myyyyyyyyyyyyyy life.
yeahh you heard me.
sooo poof! go go go! shooo!
im done with you.
and, of cos,
im a 'wanker' according to you, yeah,
cos your vocab is pretty low and unequipped,
for such an existance as yourself.
'im a doctor' and all?
yeahhhhh. you really dream too much.