arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ystday was officially the saddest day of our entire friendship.
yes.
(note: friendship)
we yelled on the phone (literally SCREAMED our butts off)
for almost 1 hour ++.
it was constant yellin',
with not a single second used for breathin.
or even listening to each other.
we just yelled what WE thot was right
not what was actually evidently right.
and now,
nth is happening.
even on the phone,
we're dead silent.
we've got nth to say to each other anymore.

and as much as you hate me or despise me
and wish me dead ):,
i really cant do anything bout the misunderstanding we had.
twas I who had made an irreparable mistake
of opening my big mouth
and 'gossiping' (as you'd call it).

we were supposed to be tog at my place right NOW
(even tho exams r in 3 days plus)
cos you promised me saturday will be ours.
LOOK NOW at this. at my lil hole here.
im fuckin lonely.
and NO i wont resort to studying
cos ive been there and still, i didnt do well AT ALL.
so im over it.
and im over this!

pout*
-hands on hips-

i baked a bunch o' cookies last night,
drove over to your place in a jiffy
and passed them to ya. (w a sweet sweet note)
maybe i didnt make myself clear-
im NOT doing it cos I think im wrong (in the misunderstandin).
i did it cos i wanted to.
and i.... well,
i guess...
imu.

THERE I SAID IT.
so dont say im always hiding things.
pout.

im hooked onto "ever the same" by Rob Thomas.
its soooooooo sweet i tell ya!

Fall on me
tell me everythin you want me to be

i am bored.
and my fucking neighbours just keep going in n out of the garage,
or have sex in some random corner of the house,
or even have a house party at 3 fucking am in the morning.
while I, ohhhh humble I,
am stuck ALONE in my randomised thoughts of NOT having a life,
and yet,
contemplating my soon-to-be regret for not having done any work for the coming exam.
im fucked, arent i?

-nods.

after this episode of unnecessary sleepless nights and
painful, painful tears,
ive woken up with the decision and will
NOT to care anymore.
even calling is not an option.
resist rach, resist.
and as much as dilini tinks im NOt over it,
im gonna pretend my arse off.
teehee (dont kill me, babe)
im just tryin to live.


ohhyes ppl, watch the Chase movie
fucking good.
bout racism. PROMINENT racism.
so its relevant.
and its soooo sad.
i NEARLY had outbursts of tears (if not for the bad bad movie envt i was in- cold, food-less, and ALONE)
sigh.