-guilt trip-

take me on a fucking guilt trip, now, wont you?
came home after lunch w alex to 2 sms-es.
(if you dont alr knw, i seldom get msgs. hah)
one from V. the other frm D.
GREAT.

so you'd think one will just die off (or at least you hope so)
and the other will linger around more.
NooooOooo.
you get one in your face (the one less desirable in terms of friendship)
and the other (the one you wish wld linger ard) hangs ard AS AND WHEN he likes to.
greatttttttttt.
i need a hole to hide my face in.
im ashamed of what i cannot decide on,
and what they cannot give to me.

dil is right- i shld settle for comfort.
at least i would.
but why cant the comfortable guy be YOU?!?!

it eats me to think about how it could have been with you.
and yet, the other part of me sits on the opposite fence
and hope i wouldnt fall off.

i shldnt have to be sooo indecisive when it comes to men.
i shldnt let my heart ctrl my head.
and i wont!
i just gotta be sure and pick- rather than regret and use the spare one instead.
): im sad.
this isnt helping the fact that i need to concentrate on my work and assignment.
i wish i knew what to do.

stoopid cupid.
suchab*tch.

even tho i knw that currently, this lil triangle of ours isnt as bad as it seems
(cos nothing is official, YET)
i jst have this urge to break it all up.
so no one has false hope with someone else.
n i hope its you in the end who'll be ther.