once again im fucked.

wtf. IDP is soooo unreasonable. I CANT GET EVERYTINK RIGHT... one reminder readers::: read my blog n leave. STOP accounting to my sister fer anitnk i say. dunt mention a tink to anione i noe... or in this case, me. get a friggin life. life's a bitch. we gave my fuckedupandstillsoarrogantmum a nickname.... so she wont noe when we're talking abt her. wahaha. now isnt life jsut a simple big bitch ad? i feel like the devil in exorcist. forever screaming vulgarities haha. well mayb i m. GOSH* wad m i saying/? i hv nv felt so much hate b4. but when i tink of how much i miss youuu my clique n meggs my darlinks!!! i feel loved again. but den again... whats the use of feeling loved when u LIVE in a hse with hatred bubbles bursting in ur face. i feel devoid of positive emotions. i feel trapped. like i wanna run but i cant catch up wif myself. NOW im at hm, whilst mie frens are camping at sentosa. i miss baobei too. he's sooooo lovely to me. sighs. where have all the good men gone? none waited fer me... heres the fuckedup convo we had today... she:: u can go to a different lawyer, RACHEL (wif ascending tone) me:: u cant. can u just fuckin listen to me? fer once. OH Wait... i tink tats too much fer u. she:: hu says i dun listen? ydae u screwed up everitink in the med checkup n u wan me to listen to u? (oBVIOUSLY she hasnt admitted defeat/) me:: HELLO? i screwed up?? an illness is wad i got. can u PRETEND u bother whether im dying or not? shE:: dying? its just a heart disease. ((ooook.here's the part i got confused wif myself.) me:: WOW. so u realise i hv that klinda disease/ WOW. n i actually tot u din realise i was dying she:: of cos i noticed. u cried so much n nearly fainted. me:: (see wad i mean? i just dunno y stepmoms dunt get it) ooook. obviously u ignored my suffering on purpose. she:: who's ignoring u? we spent so mcuh on u... (blahblaH) me:: *whispers*double bitch uh. so idp how? visa? she:: i booked the lawyer today. me:: TODAY? dad's nt back!!! hw to certify it? she:: tats wad i said! me:: (HUH??) wtf!! i just told u tt la. so how ? shE:: how i noe?? ((n she claims mothers noe best)) c wad i mean. my own fucking mother can actuallie tell me to my face that its only a small disease. every disease no matter how small is fatal. nah~ but its only death wad. NO BIGGIE x( i wanna leave now. wanna run away. but i cant. nt cos im scared or broke, but... cos I GOT A F*CKING HOLTER TEST INJECTED IN ME FER 24HRS!!! sooo i hv to remove it at the docs first. haha. u tink i wldnt hv alreadie ran away??